The big three

Posted: 05/23/2014 in Screwed

According to a little bear I know, the pope really is Catholic, and the GOP can go shit in the woods, as far as he’s concerned.  We were sharing a pot of honey one day when we came up with the theory of the GOP’s big three ideas (well, he came up with it, I just tweaked it a bit).  According to this theory, Republicans have only ever come up with three basic ideas, listed in the order of how long the GOP have been trying to get them to work: (1) block or repeal any Democratic programs that helps the average guy, (2) Impeach the Democrat, and (3) Benghazi.

(1) For over a century, Republicans have tried every trick in the book to block each and every program that looks like it’ll help anyone other than big business.  The big ideas like Social Security, Medicare, and the Affordable Care Act?  They tried desperately to block each one.  Once the programs became law, the GOP has continually tried to either (a) water the programs down to where they are useless, (b) divert the funds over to private enterprise, or (c) defund them.  They’ve used the same pattern on other ideas as well (immigration reform, women’s rights, abortion, etc.).  You’ve heard about the “Miranda Rights” that resulted from the Miranda v. Arizona court case, and you probably believe that’s a perfect case of liberal, activist judges interfering with the law by doing their job (interpreting it).  What you probably don’t know is that over the next half-dozen years after Miranda, most of the “rights” were watered down by various other court cases and bits of administrative rules the government uses that have the force of law.  Miranda, as it was originally envisioned, hasn’t actually existed since the early ’70s.  So, rather an example of how the left tramples on everyone’s rights, it’s a perfect example of how Conservatives manage to get their way by being patient and nibbling at the law from every direction possible.  And most people never see it coming.

(2) The Republican’s have tried to impeach the last two Democratic Presidents over stuff that goes on every single day in virtually every politician’s life, and every year they bring it up to see if they can try again.  And it’s not just presidents.  They’ve offered to impeach sitting judges as well as senators and congressmen with whom they disagree.

(3) Even the Republicans are not sure what Benghazi’s all about.  But they’ve discovered that it seems to work as a rallying cry against both the current Democratic President and the next possible one.  It also works to divert attention away from any good news for Democrats or bad news against the GOP.

The interesting thing about all this isn’t that the Republicans are dedicated to tearing down government instead of  supporting it, the interesting thing is that each new “idea” in that list is simpler, less complicated, and easier to say than the one before it.  If those are the first three planks in the GOP’s platform, then the fourth plank is going to have to be initials.  Or maybe just a vowel.  But one syllable for sure.

The GOP: can’t cure it, can’t beat it death.


Be seeing you.


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